So…I’ve made it no secret that I met my boyfriend on an online dating website. I’m vocal about this in real life as well. I’m not going to lie about where we met because I’m not embarrassed about having to resort to online dating. People do so much online these days I don’t know why they are embarrassed of this fact as well.
But one of the main profile killers that I would come across was the “I’m a nice guy” line.
No, it’s not that I didn’t want to date a nice guy. It just happens to be that most of the time if someone has to tell you how nice of a guy they are, it’s because they’re not. Don’t let them fool you with that “Girls only want douche bags” line, because if that was the case they wouldn’t have a problem picking up women.
They’re usually a tool who everyone else realizes the extent of their douche bag-ness but they’re totally oblivious as to why they are still single. They want to think that they fit that “Nice Guy” description and that there is some urban legend that females won’t date them yet friend-zone them.
A perfect example is my boyfriend’s best friend. One of the first times I met him he had a few drinks before meeting us at the restaurant where we were having dinner. He was complaining about the girl he was dating (who ultimately broke up with him the next week and ironically is dating his brother now) and how she was damaged from her divorce that was just recently finalized. He was rude and crass and I personally don’t know how this girl could stand to be around him (I could barely stand him for 10 minutes!) let alone date this fool.
So they break up the next week and Russell (my boyfriend) asks me if I had any available friends I could hook his friend up with. I must have shown my disgust on my face because he tried to tell me how his friend could be a nice guy but just needed a girl who could understand him.
We ended up going out for drinks with his friend again one night when he uses this famous line “I’m a nice guy but girls don’t want that. They usually want douche bags.” My jaw dropped. Because right before this statement he was asking if I had any hot Indian friends because he wanted to know what it was like to sleep with one…um. He’s continued to work himself into a pretty decent sized douche hole by the time the night ended. Later that night I told Russell to NEVER ask me to punish my friends by suggesting I try hooking his friend up with one of mine. I like my friends too much to want to have them never speak to me again after they go out with this sexist pig.
Granted, not all guys who claim this are really douche bags. I have met some guys who continually claim that they can’t get a date because they’re too nice but when females are interested in them they’re so used to being friend-zoned that they don’t realize that someone actually liked them.
And please, don’t think that just because you use this line that any female is just going to drop her panties for you. We know better than to believe something just because you spent 5 minutes writing your online profile.
So please, hold the “I’m a nice guy” line. Just prove it instead.